It Wasn't Love ✔️

Chapter 45

I know I'm not ready to go back to college, just yet. It's been weeks, and, although I've been given time off, I'm missing a lot of content. Exams are in less than a month, and I'm not prepared at all.

So, I bite my tongue and slip on a black hoodie before leaving the house. I get into my car and drive to college.

Laura is waiting at the gate when I get there, and she links her arm with mine as we both walk into college. "So..." She says, and I can hear the glint of something in her voice. " Jacob told me that you two spent some time together, the other day."

I close my eyes, shaking my head. God, I hope he didn't tell her what we did. "Er, yeah. He brought me a lasagne and we just hung out."

"Hmm." Laura nods her head, not believing me.

"Why? Did Jacob say we did something else?" I ask, and Laura laughs, tapping my arm with her spare hand.

"No, but you're making it very obvious that hanging out isn't the only thing you did. You're both a pair of nasties." She chuckles, and I sigh, throwing my head back.

"Okay, yeah. We had sex, but it's never gonna happen again." I say, even though a part of me doesn't believe it. Laura looks over at me, raising her eyebrow.

"Are you sure about that? Because, it doesn't look like you are." She says, and I lift my hood over my head, trying to hide my embarrassment. "Look it's nothing to be ashamed of." Laura says. "When I first had sex with a girl, it was this totally new experience that scared me, but the girl I was with made sure I was comfortable and ready."

"Me and Jacob have had sex before, it just... it was never like that, you know?"

"It was different to the other time?" She asks, and I nod my head. "Maybe it was because you were both were feeling different emotions. It wasn't the thought of a relationship going through your head, but the thought of losing each other. That's what was happening, right? You were losing each other."

I shrug my shoulders, tightening my hold on my rucksack. "I think I was more scared of the consequences than anything else. I kept thinking about, if we did it once, how many more times will it happen before we have to end it permanently?"

Me and Laura continue talking until we reach our classrooms, and we say our goodbyes before leaving.

***

Jacob isn't in the canteen at lunch. I sit with Charlie and wait, but when Laura shows up, she tells me he's at football training for their cup final. After eating, because I had a free period, I decided to go with Laura and watch him practise.