ADOMANIA || zhong chenle

chapter 13

they say time heals everything, but daiyu really wasn't sure how much more time would be needed to fix her fucked up relationship with chenle.

maybe it was the fact that none of them put in an effort to change something about it, or maybe three weeks just weren't enough yet.

because yeah, that's how much time had passed since they recorded the first part of their vlog.

they had gotten around to film the second one too, and it was not any better than the first.

about concerning their overall way of acting with one another, nothing had changed.

from afar, they may even have looked like a pair of good friends playfully fighting, but both daiyu and chenle knew that they meant every word they said.

if it wasn't for the project, the two didn't interact and just completely neglected the other's existence.

daiyu occupied herself with trying not to get into any trouble again, while chenle was busy enough questioning himself and the things he felt.

as he had been crushing on ah hyewon for around four months now — ever since they got paired up for combat training once — but the fact that she didn't react to his indirect confession in the cafeteria that day had left a bitter taste on his tongue.

he didn't blame her for it, nor did he hold any negative feelings for her because of that, but anyone would feel hurt if their crush just straight up ignored them after a confession.

it's your own fault. you are the one who's avoiding her.

that wasn't wrong. scared of the consequences his actions held, chenle had opted for evading the girl and simply admiring her from a distance.

just lately, it wasn't that much admiring either, and that was exactly what was worrying him.

why do i barely really feel anything anymore when i look at her? where did these annoying butterflies i used to feel by just seeing her smile go?

three weeks ago, he would've been ready to risk everything to be able to call her his, and now he barely noticed when she entered a room he was in.

somewhere in these three weeks, he stopped searching for her in a crowd of students, and didn't care much about spending his break on that particular bench in the school garden every tuesday, with the mere goal of seeing her walk to class.

but even then, chenle was convinced that it was impossible for a person to fall out of love that quickly.

but were you even actually in love?

"i think it's possible. it's not like you've liked her for years. a few months isn't enough to develop feelings that deep."

jisung was sitting on his bed, feet propped up against the wall and his head hanging off the edge.

"i feel like it was more of a superficial thing anyway. people change, feelings change. it's perfectly possible for you to get over a crush."

chenle — who was sitting on the counter of their mini-kitchen — let out a low hum.

seeing as his friend wasn't going to respond, jisung decided to keep going.

"maybe you should just approach her first. talk to her, and then you'll have your confirmation. also, if you really don't feel anything, then that way you'll finally get closure."

"i think this is the most i've ever heard you talk at once."

"shut the fuck up, i'm just trying to help."

jisung sat up straight again, getting dizzy from hanging upside down.

and the truth was that chenle knew his friend was right, but he was too much of a coward to follow his advice.

he wasn't prepared to face the girl yet. hell, he didn't even know if she wanted to talk to him, considering that she didn't make an effort to clear up the situation either.

"i'll figure something out."

internally, the younger one of the two was rolling his eyes. 'of course you will. in two months maybe.' but he decided to let the topic be for the moment, there was no need to rush anything.

"when are you meeting with daiyu?"

frowning at the reminder, chenle glanced down at his wristwatch.

"in like, half an hour."

they were going to film the third episode already, though they didn't plan on uploading it until around a week later.

in their last meeting, the two had agreed on filming a total of six episodes. two in the first and second month, and one in the last two. the reason was that the mid-term exam season would begin by the start of month two. and NSOE exam season was quite literally the epitome of hell.

two weeks of absolute torture, one hard test after the other.

and the worst part were the practical exams. just imagine daiyu in practical chemistry test, all by herself.

what i'm saying is; you wouldn't want to be too busy around that time.

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"sir, are you sure this is a good idea? this is NSOE, not some ordinary high school. their security system is basically impossible to get through."

"that's why were getting to her when she's outside of the school grounds, stupid. did you listen to him at all?"

'sir' chuckled. "thank you, seon, but i surely don't need you to speak for me."

"kim on the other hand really seems to be begging to be disciplined, aren't you?"

kim lowered his head in embarrassment, shaking to the bone. "no, sir. of course not."

memories of the last time he had received the so-called 'punishment' from the man flashed through his mind. it was not something anyone would have to go through.

usually, he wouldn't harm you, not if you were still useful to his plans and able to do the dirty work for him. instead, he would take the people dear to you; family members, best friends, even significant others.

how bad he would hurt them depended on your sin. it could be something like getting them fired from their dream job, or killing their pet, but he would go as far as causing car accidents, attacking them in the streets at night, or — if it was really bad — kill them.

kim's punishment luckily hadn't been that extreme, yet it still was enough to leave a scar on him.

his 'boss' had taken his sister. she was a year older than him, his role model. he framed her, making it look like she was sleeping around with guys. a lot of guys.

their parents, strict as they were, found out and kicked her out of the house. after that, kim didn't see her for two whole years.

it was only when he enrolled in high school that he learned that his sister had cleared her name and rebuilt her life all by her self.

what surprised him the most was that she even managed to get financial support from the government.

that whole situation happened whole three years ago already.

he felt a hand pinching his side, and quickly focused his attention back to the man in front of him.

"tomorrow, seven pm. don't be late."

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kim is not his first name btw

also, i kinda regret making chenle reconsider his feelings this fast already, but it's not like he's falling for someone else already.