Beholder

Chapter 20.

BEHOLDER.
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CHAPTER 20.
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NOKWANDA.
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2 weeks later.

Today was thee day. The day that I become the matron of honour of the same man that has been pestering me to become his second wife and I have been saying no over and over again. One time his uncles showed up in my parents house to negotiate lobola but I never dared even went there instead I sat in my apartment and tried for the 100th time to call Jason who I have not been able to get through to from the time he left. I listened to his voice message every single day like I was going crazy. I did wonder why he hadn't called me back or at least texted me back because I know I have texted him more than a thousands times. The least he could was text me back letting me know he was okay. I still hadn't been able to go to his house. I personally feel like he just ghosted me after promising me the world.

Note to self: He's probably busy. He loves you. He said he loves you so stop over thinking.

That was me just playing a fool. Nobody goes two weeks without talking to their supposedly love of their lives. He ghosted me right. I cannot believe I was back here again.

"I still can't believe you still went through with this despite the tension between you and Sibahle." That was Phiwe, we were at this room I was using that was booked for the wedding. Vusi and Sibahle were getting married in a whole hotel and I would be lying if I talked shit about their wedding. Everything was looking beautiful and very elegant. You would think this was a wedding of some decent gentleman but unfortunately it wasn't. It was a wedding of a man who had no respect for not only Sibahle but for me as well. He was only trying to marry me because he hated the thought of another man loving me or making me happy.

"Tell me about it. I also thought she would have wanted somebody else but nope. I mean she's being mean as fuck but I guess I understand but the problem is, she's angry at the wrong person." I sighed as I looked at the reflection of myself on this fancy mirror. I did look amazing. How I wish Jason was here.

I decided to take a selfie and I sent it to him with some hope that he at least would respond to it.

From me to Jason: I miss you so much. I hope you're safe.

I captioned the picture and sent it to him before I took this long sigh. "Still haven't heard from Jason"? Phiwe asked with concern and I nodded. "You think he ghosted me?" I asked looking at Phiwe but she shrugged her shoulders. "There is also a possibility something is wrong Kwanda." She was just trying to make me feel better but I knew the truth. I have been ghosted. I can't believe I had to deal with heartbreak once again. Right after healing from Vusi's one and now Jason. I am one unlucky girl when it comes to relationships.

"You could ask Austin or Greg what's going on." Phiwe suggested but I shook my head. They probably will lie as well so I won't make myself look even more pathetic than I do at this moment.

"My car is in service so after this sham of a wedding I was thinking you could like drive me to Jason's house. He did say I could use one of his cars." I diverted my eyes back on the mirror as I wondered what was it about me that made me not keep a man. I couldn't even keep a white guy.

"Sure. Uhm your mum still pressuring you about Vusi?" Phiwe took a seat on the bed with her eyes never leaving me. "She calls me every single day Phiwe and goes off on me and calls me all sort of names." I turned to Phiwe and leaned on this dresser. "I don't understand why mum always comes for me. I have made a decent life for myself and I am finally over Vusi and want a life with another guy but she's acting like this." I crossed my arms as I thought how mum has me feeling so frustrated with her. She keeps wanting me to settle with Vusi despite her knowing how he has treated me. How he has cheated on me for the majority of out relationship. She was the one that once said she wished we could find men that would love us and stay loyal to us but now she wants me to get into a polygamy marriage with a man who has zero respect for his current wife. How is he going to respect me if he can't respect Sibahle?

"I know Jason might have ghosted you but at least he made you get over Vusi." I swear I rolled my eyes at Phiwe because what good is that when I now was about to transfer all the feelings I felt for Vusi to him. I was feeling the exact same pain that I felt when Vusi dumped me and this time,it even seemed worse.

"Well we're back to square one Phiwe. I am about to attend a shrink because the pain I feel in my heart right now is undescribable. I cry myself to sleep because I am afraid of you guys judging me for crying over him." My tears instantly filled my eyes as I thought of how every minute that passes by without Jason texting or calling,my heart broke. Each piece that he had put back together broke and this time into tiny little pieces that no one else could put together ever again.

"I feel played. He played me. Made me feel like he actually liked me only for him to ghost me at the first chance he got." My tears couldn't stay hidden anymore. They needed this freedom so they could express how broken and hurt I was feeling.

Phiwe walked over to me and pulled me into hug. "I am sorry Kwanda."

The door creaked open and in strutted Sibahle,she had on those gowns written Bride. I wonder why she wasn't ready as yet.  "I hope it is not my man that is making you ruin such expensive make up." She looked at us up and down like we were some peasants begging her for some left over bread crumbs from her master table. Phiwe and I just looked at her as she did her miss universe walk. "And I don't remember saying you can invite your friends to my wedding." This time she looked at Phiwe who just gave her middle fingers.

"I almost complimented you Sibahle but your bitchiness got in the way." Phiwe could be such a savage when she liked.

"Whatever." Sibahle rolled her eyes before they stayed on my ones that I was busy trying to wipe away the tears from.

"I do hope you understand,you will never be part of my family. I refuse to have you as a sister wife Nokwanda. So you crying over my man will not be tolerated." She crossed her arms and even tapped her feet. "She actually has a man. The one that actually likes her and the one that would never ask another woman to be a sister wife so chill and keep your man how,she don't want him." Phiwe continued being a savage and the way Sibahle turned pink told me how pissed she was.

"It may have taken me sometime to get over Vusi but it was expected. I dated him for 6 years and I kept going back and forth with you over him for 6 years. There was never a time where I truly enjoyed my relationship with him because you were a part of it as well. I wonder how you're going to enjoy your marriage cause I am going to be a part of it till eternity. He's always going to try and force me into this sham of a fuckin marriage and you will have no choice but to say yes baba because you have nothing going for yourself Sibahle except for him. I am glad it is not me who is about to wear his ring. I would rather be the girl that got left than the girl that's about to have a miserable marriage." I actually did feel sorry for her. Why was she so desperate to have this man even after he has shown that he was not as inlove with her as she thought he was. Who proposes marriage to his ex weeks before your wedding and you just accept it? What kind of relationship do these two have?

I watched her take in my words. She didn't have a comeback for me which was a first. Sibahle always has a come back for everything. "You better get ready. As your matron of honour,I think it's only right you get ready." I said and that's how she stormed out of this room leaving Phiwe laughing so hard at her. I am sure she heard.

"Bitch you got served!" Phiwe yelled after her but I couldn't even laugh or share Phiwe's excitement. I have been ghosted by the man I was convinced was my soulmate. I guess I spoke too soon. Maybe my friends were right. I do wear my heart on my sleeve and that is why I got hurt so easily. I mean look at how easy I fell in love with Jason. It didn't even take me a month to fall heels in love with him and now he was nowhere to be found.

"I still think Austin and Greg have your answer about what going on with Jason." She spoke giving this suggestive look but I shook my head. I was not about to be that girl that when around talking the friends of the guy that just ghosted me. Hell no.
I just wanted to get this wedding over and done with so I could go and get the car from my Jason's house and deep down I wish I could find him home so we could have our make up sex and promise each other the world but I knew that was just wishful thinking.
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As a person who has once suffered from being ghosted by a guy you thought could possibly be the love of your life. I feel for Nokwanda.