36.Meera

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song :Hold on

Past holds us back

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Past holds us back. It will always hold someone back reminding them of things they could never forget. Reminding of their failures. Reminding them of the pain they felt .
Of the heartbreak.
Of the betrayal.

Kabir stared down form the skyscraper he stood in. The busy street's and the Busy life of people Stared back at him.

He didn't know what it was that hurt him. The fact that he kissed her knowing it was her weak moment. Or the fact that she regretted the kiss.  For him the kiss was sacred. Because After so long he felt home and he felt alive. Having her in his arms was peace . She was the goddess he would worship all his life.

But she didn't want him.

And even if she did want him at some point he knew he would lose her. Because he had kept the biggest truth of her life away from her. He had hid one of the biggest secrets and he knew it would eventually Destroy him and her.

He just hoped When the time came it wouldn't hurt her too much. He had gambled his faith With her. And he knew he'd pay the price sooner or later.

He would lose her .This time eventually she would be gone. And he knew he would have to be okay with it. He would have to Prepare himself for her absence.

She may love him at some point but she wouldn't want him because of the lies he had Said.

he had dug a hole for himself and now he was going to be the one laying in it. He would be the one to call it his grave.

He rubbed his palms on his face trying to shrug the thoughts off. The thoughts of her leaving him. The thought of her never coming back to him.

How did he even let himself think that she would want him by a mere kiss. It wouldn't change a thing. He was just complicating his and her life more by expecting her love.

Was he really this heartless that he wanted her love and trust just to break it all later. Just to shatter everything that she would build by her trust and love on him.

Was he really this Cruel? Would he be this Cruel to Avani. ?

He didn't want to. He knew it.

He knew she was feeling something for him now. And now when the severity of the situation was sinking in . He realised he was being so cruel to her by asking her for more. By expecting more from her While he somewhere knew she would break herself to stay afloat with him.

He had to keep himself away from her. It would destroy them both if he didn't stop now.

It was a Week since that Kiss. And there had been So much ignorance from his side . Everytime she would want to talk he would leave or avoid her. He didn't want to but he knew he had to.  Talking to her would ignite a hope in him but what's the use of a hope when his very own relationship with her was built up on a lie.

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