Lost Loving Souls (Connor x Reader)

Chapter 83

Gavin's POV

We got home and Collin shut the door behind him as he came in behind me. It was normal at first...until he completely ignored Cheezy as he tried to go and greet him. Cheezy meowed at him, but Collin only glanced at him and kept walking. He sat down at my kitchen table and stayed there. I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Hey, tin can," No response. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" I snapped.

"What?" He growled. His voice was low and sounded dangerous. I was surprised by this. I'd never seen Collin act like this. 

"What's the matter with you?" I asked. He stood up. I saw that he was gripping the table hard enough for his knuckles to start to turn white.

"I didn't think such things would matter to you, Detective." 

"What the fuck did I do!? What's got your circuits in a twist?" I saw that his LED was red. 

"Nothing." He told me. "Why would I be upset? I hardly care what comments others make as it is." I was confused, but he turned and walked to the spare bedroom, closing the door behind him. I didn't know what to do. I just stayed there, trying to pretend it didn't happen. However, Cheezy meowed loudly and angrily at me. I looked at him.

"What do you want me to do? He could fuckin' kill me, I hope you know! You think I want to piss him off more than he already is?" Cheezy meowed again and I groaned in annoyance. "Fine! I'll try to talk to him if that's what pleases you!" Cheezy's ears went back up and I assumed that was a yes. I sighed, rolling my eyes as I pushed myself off the couch and headed toward the spare bedroom.

I hesitated to knock. I honestly didn't want to piss Collin off. I knew that he was advanced and he could probably break my neck in three seconds flat. I sighed and knocked anyway.

"Hey, you alright in there?" I asked. I wasn't exactly good at comforting people. I used to comfort (Y/n) with jokes and advice which had worked, but I didn't think Collin would be the same way. Still, I got no response. I sighed. "You know, I don't normally try to make an effort for other people, let alone an android, so if you don't want it, then whatever. Stay in there." I said. I hoped that would lure him out or at least get him to say something. I got no answer. I honestly was surprised by this. Collin never acted like this. Still, I couldn't get to him. I left, glancing back at the door as I went back down the hall.

I sat down and Cheezy looked sad. I frowned. "What? I tried!" He hopped off the couch and padded to the spare bedroom door. He started pawing at it and meowing relentlessly. I groaned. "God damn cat." I walked over and picked him up to get him to stop, but just as I straightened out, Collin opened the door. We both locked gazes in surprise and Cheezy meowed happily before wriggling out of my arms and padding off to go eat. I glared at the cat as he left. You cheeky little shit. You set me up for this! I pushed it aside and turned to face Collin. He didn't shut the door again, which was something, but he refused to meet my gaze.

"What do you want to even say to me?" He asked, his voice still holding some bitterness in it. I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly.

"Uh...well...I just wanted to check on you, I guess?" I said.

"You 'guess'?" He asked, still not exactly pleased with my response. I let a bit of my annoyance get away from me.

"Look, you think I know jack shit about talking to people!? Why the hell would I want to get tangled up in emotional drama all the time!?" 

"Well, even I know shouting isn't a good start." He retorted. I was honestly pissed off with his attitude. Since when had he acted like this? I wasn't gonna guess what the hell was up with him. I was either gonna get to the bottom of it or make him stop the damn pity party.

"What the hell is wrong with you!? You have no fuckin' reason to be acting like shit all of a sudden!" He glared at me.

"And why do my emotions matter to you, Reed?" He growled. He usually never called me that. At least, not without the word Detective before it. He sometimes used it to snap witty retorts, but he never did it with any emotion. Not like he was now.

"It matters because if you're gonna fuckin' live under my roof, you aren't gonna get the option of just acting like shit whenever you want to!" I snapped.

"And you are going to stop me?" He hissed. 

"You can't do anything to me! You wouldn't! You would get yourself fired!" I was suddenly pinned against the wall. I gasped as I looked up at him. His LED was almost burning red and his eyes seemed to be lit with anger. He was gripping my shirt so tight that his knuckles were turning white again. It was then I realized just how far I'd pushed him.

"You have no idea what I would do. You know nothing about me." I tried to act like I wasn't terrified. I gripped his arm.

"Let go of me!" He smirked slightly.

"Or what, Reed? You're pathetic." I stared at him in terror. For a moment it was Collin, but I saw a flash of my sister. That sickening grin on her face. The one that made me see what a monster she truly was. "What's the matter, Gav? Scared? Pfft, you really are pathetic." I didn't want to cry in front of him. I didn't want to be scared. I wanted to prove that I wasn't what they said. 

"I-I'm not pathetic!" I yelled. 

"You can't even defend yourself against me. Explain to me just how exactly you're the one in control?" I couldn't help it. The tears started to form, but I quickly snapped my eyes shut to hold them back. 

"L-let go!" I struggled to get away. My heart was racing. I knew Collin was probably all bark and no bite toward me at the moment, but that's what I thought about my sister too. He frowned a bit.

"What?" I gave in. I couldn't keep the act up.

"P-please...l-let go..." I was suddenly set gently on the ground. I was trying not to shake, but I was failing at that. I looked up at him. 

"I-I was right. Y-you're all the same!" I snapped. He looked stunned. 

"Gavin...I...I didn't mean to-"

"Shut the fuck up, you plastic devil! I knew it all along! You didn't care! You can't care! You're just a fucking machine! You don't care about anything!" I yelled. 

"Gavin-"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT, YOU HEAR ME!?" I yelled. "You can stay tonight, but tomorrow...you're never setting foot in my house again." I hissed, trying not to let my voice shake. He looked shocked and upset. 

"I...please, listen. I'm sor-"

"Don't even try," I growled. "Make another wrong step and I'll shoot you." I turned and began to quickly walk to my room. "Don't think I won't." With that, I slammed the door and I tried to contain myself. I covered my mouth, trying to conceal my cries and whimpers. My other hand went across my stomach as I felt sick with my emotions. I collapsed to my knees, letting the tears fall, but still trying to silence my sobs. I had never felt so hurt. I didn't even understand why this hurt so bad. I wasn't supposed to act like this. I wasn't supposed to be so childish. I was a grown man, for God's sake. And yet...I had never felt so weak. I had never felt more alone or lost than how I was feeling in that moment. I had told myself this lesson before, but I had been foolish enough to ignore it. Now, I knew it was true. The only person I could trust...was me.